I got two emails today that I’d been mentioned on deactivated blogs. So, because I am curious about why they’d say my name then delete, I went to Google cache to see what ghostly traces they left behind. One was the blog of a teen age girl that I never knew. She’d had her laptop privs taken away and was made by her parents to delete her blog. And she didn’t have time to say goodbye to the friends she made here.
And I just cried. I cried because I’d feel HORRIBLE if I had to leave tumblr not of my own accord, if I couldn’t say goodbye to all the amazing people I’ve met here, if I lost my fandom community. AND I’M 44 YEARS OLD. If I had had tumblr at 16 and my parents made me delete my blog, I would have been utterly shattered- completely and utterly despondent. I have to ask myself do they have any idea what they took from her? What could have been her life circumstance in which that would be the right thing for her?
I’m not a parent (nor do I ever want to be) but I’d like to think they are doing the right thing by her. Maybe it’s the porn? Would I care if my 16 year old girl was watching porn and shipping madly? I have no idea. I was just so moved by her swift goodbye into the ether. I wish that young girl all the joy there is.
The second blog was odd, too. I didn’t know them either, but I checked their tag and many, many people are upset that they just suddenly disappeared. It was unexpected to all, evidently. I hope they’re safe and sound.
Why does tumblr think they mentioned me? Did they? Right before they left? Or is this some weird bug? IDK.
Godspeed former tumblrers. Peace be with you.
Honestly, it’s hard for me to be disappointed in anything. I’m one of those annoyingly optimistic types. Especially when it comes to stuff like this. One of my friends was very critical of The Desolation of Smaug—he has every right to be—and the whole time I thought, This is a movie and it’s a lovely movie and look at the scale and this is magnificent omg it’s an actual movie it’s a movie I’m crying look it’s a movie that everyone can enjoy.
So yeah. Keep that in mind while I reflect on my season 3 opinion. Because it’s going to be happy. I do have my qualms, but they are minuscule compared to how much joy and excitement I felt watching season 3 for the first time. I do no begrudge anyone for feeling otherwise, though. It’s possible to be critical of something and love it at the same time. In fact, that’s often a sign of being a huge fan. I’m just one of those weird huge fans and spews positivity everywhere like a geyser of rainbows and butterflies.
The Empty Hearse. I DO admit that TEH wasn’t what I had been expecting. I spent so long reading all the angsty, heart-rending fic I could get my hands on that I forgot Sherlock is actually a funny show. A dark comedy, but a comedy nevertheless. They were never going to treat Sherlock’s return with the gravity we’d all come to expect because that’s not the way the show works. So after my initial shock of non-tearful-reunion feels, I thought the episode was brilliant. It was a tribute to fandom in the best sense and I loved how even though Sherlock and John spent the majority of the episode apart, it almost didn’t feel that way. BECAUSE THEY WERE THINKING ABOUT EACH OTHER EVERY OTHER SECOND SRSLY. John is supposedly ‘getting on with his life’, but he’s at Sherlock’s grave and then at 221B. I think the only time he’s NOT thinking of Sherlock is when he’s about to propose to Mary, but Sherlock counterbalances John’s not-thinking-of-Sherlock with his notice-me-notice-me-NOTICE-ME. So yeah. They’re damaged, delusional, and Sherlock’s top priority is to make John laugh. My feelings are 10000000896% done.
The Sign of Three: This is my favorite episode. I don’t even care. It’s my absolute favorite episode. Because John gets the credit he deserves. It’s a love letter to John Watson. I don’t believe he’s been given enough credit since the very beginning and this did so much for me as a long-time fan. I am so happy John Watson was recognized. Not to mention! Did you ever imagine that Sherlock and John would get drunk together and play silly games? I didn’t. It was magic. This episode was every bit about Sherlock’s love for John. We don’t get that a lot in canon. I mean, Sherlock obviously cares, and you see glimpses of it, and rarely does Watson see how much Holmes loves him, but my soul needed this. So bad. I needed John Watson to see. And I needed Sherlock to see. And this episode delivers.
His Last Vow: SO MANY CANON REFS OMG. The drugs, Wiggins, the burglary. I am a happy, happy girl. I knew what was going on with Janine the moment she stepped out of Sherlock’s bedroom so I enjoyed what I imagine was supposed to be a shock-and-awe moment. But you know. It was delicious. John’s jealousy gives me life. He’s so protective. I love it. I EVEN figured out who they were going to run into in CAM’s office before they got there. I didn’t imagine Sherlock would get shot, though. That was probably the only part of the episode where I freaked out. It was like TPTB reminding you that this is THEIR show and they can mix it up a bit. So exciting. Though very nerve-wracking. Poor Sherlock. I must say the sequence of events surrounding Mary shooting him was absolutely gorgeous. So so so pretty. I’ll probably get in trouble for saying this, but Sherlock clawing back to life for John was worth the pain of my favorite literary character getting shot. (Don’t hate me.) There are so many clues in the final episode and it’s very exciting. I can’t wait to see what they’re going to do next.
This interview I’ll be posting soon addresses bulimia at great length. I want interested people to see it, but I’m also sensitive to the fact that it’s a triggery topic. The interviewee talks at length about her experiences with bulimia and how she depicts it in her film. What she has to say will be controversial to some people. So question one- is #tw: bulimia the preferred tag and question two- do I need to indicate that it is potentially controversial with a tag? If so what tag should I use? Also, would you avoid posting pull quotes on tumblr about bulimia from the interview even if they’re properly tagged?
It’s about making films, how they DON’T get made and why, female audiences, being a woman in a male-dominated industry, her own experiences with deep sexism, her career path, the severe eating disorder she had in her 20’s, bulimia, what she wrote in the script versus what you see on screen- her three hats: the writer’s view of the film, and the director’s and the producer’s. Tammy is such a passionate person- lovely to talk with. Frank and bold.
You’ll want to watch Delicious b/c the interview with Tammy is so damned interesting! (Also spoilers.)
I’m very emotional about this little film, very invested in it as a woman, as a feminist myself, as a fan. And the reality is that Tammy’s next film is going to be as big of a struggle to get made as Delicious was. Because sales. This reality breaks my heart and pisses me off b/c she has so much important shit to say.
Download her film, support it with high ratings and generous reviews. Do your part to make a difference. As consumers you have great power and can make a huge difference for a small film such as this. If you want to see films by women about women vote with your wallet.
Delicious the film (starring Louise Brealey as Stella)
You’ve got a about two weeks to watch Delicious as it will take me that long to process the transcript once I’m finished. Buy it now!! We got the film trending in iTunes but it needs a new boost.
I’m also looking for people who can translate my interview into Chinese and Korean as the film will be released in theaters in South Korea, Taiwan, and perhaps Hong Kong. If you don’t have time to translate, perhaps you can beta a translation? Betas are invaluable and making this interview available to people who will actually see Delicious in theaters is soooooo important!